2016

I love Pride and Prejudice. And so apparently does everyone else. There’s so many adaptations of this story, it’s almost cliche to be that cliche. There’s even a movie ABOUT reading Pride and Prejudice. It’s probably on the same level as A Christmas Carol, but maybe with less Hallmark movies. Although who knows, there’s two months of films about to be introduced this year.

The movie follows the original book almost to the letter, except every once in a while, the characters have to fight zombies. The zombies exist in this world (possibly caused by a French plague–fucking French), and instead of teaching his daughters just normal society hobbies, Mr. Bennett also makes sure they are skilled in the Japanese art of “zombie killing.” So very progressive of him.

Despite the undead walking among them, it doesn’t stop high society from throwing parties, marrying off their daughters, and gossiping as if their lives depend on it. The Bennett girls try to navigate the world, being a lot smarter than most of the people around them. Even the ones who aren’t losing their brains and faces.

Elizabeth Bennett is the main character who constantly crosses paths with Mr. Darcy, who is a zombie investigator. He uses flies to determine if a person is undead, just not showing symptoms. He’s still extremely socially awkward and constantly insults Elizabeth and her family. Unless, he does it on purpose and this was an early form of negging….Hmm, Jane Austen, did you predict the future of courtship?

While Lizzie and Darcy dance around their sexual frustration (as I assume every one is this time period did), her older sister Jane is in the process of getting wooed by Darcy’s best friend, and her younger sister is getting wooed by Darcy’s sworn enemy. And the Bennett’s cousin is trying just to get with whomever will have him. Inside or outside the family. England can’t be that small, but I guess a zombie plague kind of limits the available suitors.

If you’ve read either the book or seen Bridget Jonses’ Diary, then you know how this will end. However getting to end is a fun trip, because it is hilarious to see how Georgian-era women would fight while keeping their empire waist dresses intact.

This movie didn’t get good reviews or make a ton of money, probably because of how long it had been in production before getting bounced around with different lead actors and directors. Unfortunately, when a project is an orphan for so long, it often gets either hyped into oblivion, or people forget about it. When the book was written, the world was at the height of the zombie craze, but now it almost seems cliche. Almost as cliche as another Pride and Prejudice reboot. Almost.